Tiki Talk: The Jokes of Episode 5 and More

12/10/13

Since the Mars One program has been announced over 200,000 people have applied to be astronauts who will travel to Mars and live the rest of their lives on the planet. 

12/9/13

A NASA satellite has determined the coldest place on earth, a ridge in Antarctica where it gets as cold as minus 133.6 degrees Fahrenheit. Of course that's still nothing compared to the minus 157.4 degrees that is Ann Coulter's vagina. 

12/8/13

Barron Hilton, cousin of Paris Hilton, was allegedly beat up by someone at the request of Lindsay Lohan. Paris Hilton then issued a statement, "No one fucks with my family and gets away with it!" Our insiders are telling us her plan is to kill Lindsay Lohan's twin sister. As fantastic a plan as I've ever heard.

Singer Susan Boyle was recently diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. The singer said it was a relief because now when people ask her if she has Down Syndrome she can officially deny it.

A snuggling service in Madison, Wisconsin is being investigated for suspicions of prostitution. An undercover cop said he became suspicious when an employee offered him a cigarette after the cuddling took place. 

...Undercover police said they became suspicious when they overheard employees calling their manager "daddy." 

A reindeer in Colorado escaped and ran away from its mall-Santa owner. 

A couple was accidentally given a bag of money when they went through a McDonald's drive through. McDonald's was testing their new negative $1 menu. 

12/6/13

Kenyan rugby player Daniel Adongo will be suiting up for his first NFL game as a Colt this Sunday against the Bengals. He said he is very 

...He said he won't be a Colt forever, just long enough to heal a broken ankle before returning to Kenya to play more rugby.

12/3/13

Recently, Pope Francis told some Catholics in a church just outside of Rome that he once worked as a bouncer at a nightclub. It didn't last long however because saying "the power of Christ compels you!" does not work on big dudes and drunk white bitches. 

Online retailer Amazon recently announced plans to start using "octocopter drones" to deliver packages to its customers in the near future. Russianbrides.com also announced a similar program to deliver brides,